1.What is Depression?
Depression is what a person experiences when their fight-or-flight response becomes overly active. This excess activity is most commonly due to stress. Stress that extends beyond a few moments or hours and into days, weeks and months. This prolonged exposure to stress and more specifically stress-related hormones of adrenaline and cortisol can not only lead to serious mental health concerns but to physical health issues including heart, autoimmune diseases and more. https://www.healthline.com/health/depression/effects-on-body#immune-system-and-heart
How to overcome Depression through being Present.
Overcoming Depression in 6 steps.
Hello and welcome to The Present Method where we help you overcome Anxiety through learning to be Present. My name is Mr. Presentr, and today we are talking about how The Present Method can help us overcome Depression and restore our sense of control over our lives. The Present Method helps us accomplish this by…
1. Helping us understand what Depression is, where it comes from and what drives it.
2. Understanding the important differences between Anxiety and Depression.
3. Understanding how to overcome symptoms of Depression.
4. Overcoming Depression in 6 steps.
What are some signs and symptoms?
Feelings of sadness, irritability, emptiness and/or hopelessness.
Loss of interest or pleasure in activities that were once enjoyable.
Changes in appetite leading to significant weight gain or loss (outside of dieting).
Sleeping too little or too much.
Decreased energy, increased tiredness or fatigue.
Feelings of worthlessness or excessive guilt.
Difficulty thinking, concentrating, forgetfulness, and/or difficulty making minor decisions.
Thoughts of death, suicidal ideation, or suicide attempts. https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/depression/what-is-depression
Just how common?
According to the National Institute of Mental Health, “An estimated 21 million adults in the United States had at least one major depressive episode. This number represented 8.3% of all U.S. adults. The prevalence of major depressive episode was higher among adult females (10.3%) compared to males (6.2%). The prevalence of adults with a major depressive episode was highest among individuals aged 18-25 (18.6%)”. https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/statistics/major-depression.
Let’s stop and digest some of this information. We’ve learned that… Depression affects major areas of our lives. What people who have Depression experience. The number of adults who’ve experienced depression in their lives, 8.3%. That’s nearly 1 in 10 adults. If you are over the age of 18, chances are you know someone who has Depression whether you know it or not.
2. What are the important differences between Anxiety and Depression?
Depression has more intense anxiety-related symptoms.
During the day a person may feel fatigued as they are having to do the same amount of work with as little as half the energy they are supposed to have. Yet at night, they cannot sleep. They may spend hours looking at the ceiling before finally drifting off. And even when they do sleep, the quality may not be great. Waking up frequently during the night or waking up tired the next day. The fight-or-flight response is responsible for this as well.
During the day, we experience stressors causing our fight-or-flight response to be active, leading to the fatigue. At night however, the response becomes less active (as there are fewer stressors) and we feel less fatigue and may feel more tension, irritability or just a general sense of being “up” or “active”. Typically this is where symptoms of anxiety start to appear (see the page on anxiety for more).
The result, the person having a hard time sleeping. I think we can agree that this sounds like a pretty miserable state of affairs, and it is. A person’s psyche can only handle so much constant misery until psychological problems start to develop.
Depression impacts productivity to a much greater extent.
The first one we shall tackle is lack of motivation. In most psychological literature and websites you’ll see lack of motivation or interest as one of the key characteristics of Depression. In my time working with people who have this problem; it is not a lack of motivation but really a lack of willpower. Difficulty in marshaling their forces to engage in activities and complete tasks. It is not that a person DOES NOT want to do something (motivation) but rather that they CANNOT as their ability or energy is being sapped or taken from them. “Where does the energy go?” The energy stays right inside the depressed person but they do not have access to it to complete tasks.
Depression impacts personality to a much greater degree.
All the things we discussed add up to us having a bad mood and poor self-esteem. Our bad mood and poor self-esteem can cause our relationships to become strained as we find ourselves saying and doing things we regret later. This only makes our self-esteem worse which can lead to poor performance at work or school. As we may find ourselves not putting as much as effort as we did formerly because we don’t believe we can get stuff done (low self-esteem). This combined with a loss of willpower puts us in a space where we don’t feel like doing anything. This negative space looks different for each person but the impact on personality is still broadly the same.
The “Depressed” Personality
In my time working with individuals I’ve picked up on a pattern of personality traits or characteristics that is common to nearly all the people I’ve helped. There are 7 qualities that seem to afflict nearly all severely depressed people. Those 7 are as follows, self-judgment, resignation, lack of gratitude, cowardice, dishonesty, lack of humility and disinterestedness. That’s not to say people who have these qualities become depressed. Rather, people who have depression can acquire some or all of these traits. “How is that possible?” you ask. The chemical imbalance that is at the heart of Depression impacts personality and potentially even the structure of your brain.
We would do well to ask ourselves “what is personality anyway?” Personality according to one definition…”refers to the enduring characteristics and behavior that comprise a person’s unique adjustment to life, including major traits, interests, drives, values, self-concept, abilities, and emotional patterns.” https://www.apa.org/topics/personality. These “enduring characteristics” are very stable electro-chemical reactions that occur within the brain.
These stable electro-chemical interactions can become disrupted when they are exposed to an overabundance of adrenaline and cortisol. This disruption can lead to personality changes. Up to this point, these changes have not been made plain. We will examine them one at a time and see how they can lock a person into a specific way of being and seeing the world and how The Present Method can offer them a door to the way out.
Self-judgment
The first trait is self-judgment. People who experience depression tend to be more self-judgmental than those who don’t. They tend to highlight the negatives in their own performance and life in general. The result is a pessimistic attitude toward future performance or potential good situations they could find themselves. This disposition can lead to self-centeredness and an inability to be happy for others. Often accelerating a person’s tendency to self-isolate. After all, who wants to be around a person who can’t be happy for others? In order to counter this tendency, The Present Method encourages the person to engage in activities that promote self-compassion. Here, the person is encouraged to consider areas in which they are succeeding. The Present Method deploys a number of tactics to help individuals cultivate this trait including journaling and meditation.
Resignation
The second trait is resignation. Individuals who experience depression often give up too easily on goals they may have set for themselves. The quality of self-judgment plays a role here as failure to accomplish a goal or task is met with our harsh inner critic. “You’re worthless! I knew you couldn’t do it”. Are potential things we may say to ourselves. The end result is giving up and a confirmation of our already self-judgmental disposition. The Present Method encourages a person to persevere when faced with trials. Indeed all of the self-care we engage in helps us persevere. That’s why it’s so important.
Lack of gratitude
The third trait is lack of gratitude. Depressed people struggle with looking at the positive things they have in their life. They tend to gloss over them and focus on the negatives. This tendency keeps people in a negative head space despite having good things and good things happening around them. The Present Method encourages individuals to recognize the positives. Individuals are encouraged to have a gratitude journal that they keep on a daily basis to train their minds to focus on the positive aspects of the day.
Cowardice
The fourth trait is cowardice. Depressed individuals may at times have to grapple with being cowardly. They may struggle to face themselves or others when it comes to mistakes they’ve made and taking ownership. This is connected to self-judgment. If a person is already feeling bad about themselves: they are not going to be sprinting to taking ownership of something they did. Doing so will only make them feel worse and judge themselves more harshly. The Present Method encourages the person to at least face themselves and take ownership internally. Even if they haven’t made things right with the party that has been wronged yet.
Dishonesty
The fifth trait is dishonesty. People experiencing depression may lie to themselves and others. They may lie about how they feel regarding a certain situation. Whether or not they’re responsible for certain actions or outcomes. Here again, accountability is an issue which relates back to self-judgment. The Present Method encourages the individual to at least be honest with themselves about their situation. Moving forward from a position truth is the only way to move forward at all.
Lack of humility
The sixth trait is lack of humility. Individuals experiencing depression tend to struggle with arrogance and/or pride. The way they see the world is the way that it is. This trait is not necessarily expressed by the person thinking they are better than they are but rather by not being open to new ideas or ways of seeing things. The lack of openness implies that they know better than virtually everyone who has tried to help them in the past. The Present Method encourages humility by assessing for openness. If they’re not open, why not?
Disinterestedness
The seventh and final trait is disinterestedness. Depressed individuals may at times struggle with being curious about new ways of thinking and being. This is linked to humility but has more to do with being interested intellectually and/or academically and less to do with their values and/or the condition of their inner person. The Present Method encourages a person to be curious. And if they aren’t, why not?
3. How do we overcome Depression?
Be open
We need to work toward being more open. When a situation we find ourselves in isn’t going the way we had hoped. Are we open to the possibility that the turn of events could bring about something positive, directly or indirectly? Are we certain that this change is and always will be bad? How open are we to things being different than they’ve always been? How do we feel about change in general? These are questions we need to ask ourselves to assess our level of openness. If we move toward being more open, we will find some of our depressive symptoms will lessen.
Finishing the home
Finishing the home requires cultivating qualities within ourselves that help foster positive emotion and resilience. We will now consider each in turn.
Perseverance
The most important quality to cultivate is perseverance. Perseverance is important as we need to persevere to resist the negative self-talk and self-judgment that is so characteristic of Depression. The more stressed and thereby the more Depressed we become the stronger the pull to be self-critical becomes. When we don’t resist the pull to be self-critical and “give in” as it were. We can find ourselves dwelling on our stressors potentially leading to catastrophizing (making things bigger than they are). Imagining potential future outcomes of our stressors (which most likely won’t happen). Even imagining additional things that may stress us out.
Honesty
The fifth quality is honesty. Along with courage, there are times where we may need to be honest with ourselves or others. This may require confronting an unpleasant truth(s) that we may have been avoiding. Causing us stress and contributing to our depressive symptoms as a whole. Once again, we may take a loss in the short-term but in the long-term, we are going to be less stressed and less anxious.
Humility
The sixth quality is humility. There may be times where we hold ourselves and others to a standard that isn’t always realistic. Trying to meet standards that are unrealistic can cause a lot of stress and sometimes symptoms of Depression. This is especially true when we and those we care about consistently fail to meet those standards. Pefectionism can be fatal to our well-being if it isn’t tempered with humility and an honest appraisal of our and others’ capabilities.
Curiosity
The final quality is curiosity. There may be times where we become so focused on one thing that we think will make us happy that the potential of not getting it can cause us to feel Depressed. For example, we all know a super competitive person. The possibility of losing for such a person can be very stressful. This person may struggle with curiosity as they are blinded to other opportunities for happiness.
Learn to calm our body.
Depression occurs when a person’s body is overstimulated for long periods of time (weeks, months etc). Therefore a depressed person’s first task is to calm their body down. This can be done very simply through a daily meditative practice. Meditating on a daily basis will calm the body and restore some of the energy that is lost during a depressive episode. This is important as that energy is needed for continued improvement in our mental health. Building a mental health routine to overcome depressive symptoms is much like building a home.
The Foundation
The first thing we need is the foundation. The foundation of a good mental health routine is diet, sleep, water and exercise. The energy that we reclaim from learning to be calm can then be used to improve these areas of our lives. Folks who experience Depression tend to have poor diets. They may find themselves eating things that are high in salt, fat and sugar. They may also find themselves not eating at all, resulting in drastic weight loss. This instability only makes their symptoms worse. Diet is therefore the first thing that needs to be fixed. Folks should swap their pop tarts for a piece of wheat toast with some peanut butter.
The Frame.
The next part of the home we need to build is the frame. Building the frame involves having the proper mindset or attitude toward our situation. This mindset or “framework” involves being calm, patient and open.
Learn to calm our mind
Once our body has calmed down. We have to learn to calm our mind. This is no small feat for those who have depressive symptoms. Often our minds are hectic, filled with self-judgment and negative self-talk. Calming our minds involves shifting our attention away from our thoughts and onto our body or breath. Allowing the thoughts to come and go without taking them seriously. Understanding and appreciating that our thoughts do not always match up with reality is an important first step.
Learn to be patient
When we find ourselves experiencing some depressive symptoms, it’s usually because we’re in some sort of stressful situation. Often times without a clear solution or path forward. Here, we must be patient as a solution may present itself in the near future. We need to make sure we’re on the lookout and not blinded by our own intense negative emotions.
Self-compassion
The second quality to cultivate is self-compassion. Self-compassion is important as individuals who experience Depression judge themselves quite harshly. This tendency often leads to greater levels of Depression as a person becomes afraid of making mistakes which can lead to feelings of powerlessness. Cultivating self-compassion helps us become less self-critical. When we’re less self-critical, we become less afraid and therefore less Depressed. Allowing us to feel more effective in our lives.
Gratitude
The third quality is gratitude. Cultivating gratitude helps us become less Depressed as we can focus on the good in our lives right now. This draws our attention away from our depressive symptoms and onto the positives. Gratitude and self-compassion bolster perseverance as they encourage optimism and positive emotion. Both of which are needed if we are to persevere through trials and stressors.
Courage
The fourth quality is courage. At times we may need to face our stressors and take some sort of action. Our initial reaction may be to avoid dealing with the stressor(s). Avoidance may help us in the short-term but is debilitating in the long-term. As Depression can get worse over time if we don’t make changes.
4. Overcoming Depression in 6 steps.
Step 1: Begin a daily meditative practice.
Step 2: Establish a consistent sleep-wake cycle.
Step 3: Start moving toward a diet that is high in fiber and protein (You may want to consult a nutrionist).
Step 4: Establish a a regular exercise routine. Start out with once a week and see if you can move toward 2-3x per week.
Step 5: Work toward being less self-judgmental when it comes to past mistakes. (There’s an old phrase, “hurt people, hurt people).
Step 6: Consider any strained relationships you may have and see if there’s a way to “mend some fences”.
The Wrap-up.
While there’s a lot more to being Present and The Present Method itself. These 6 steps will help you establish a good foundation in overcoming your depressive symptoms. It’s important to remember that these steps must become habits. While we experience our symptoms psychologically and they can appear to be static.
In reality, they are not. they are dynamic. This is proved true when we really pay attention and observe our symptoms. They change from day-to-day because we change from day-to-day. There’s an old saying, “we never step into the same river twice”. In much the same way, our body is never the exact same twice. If we understand and appreciate that we are dynamic; we will see the need for habits that address such dynamism.
Depression can be likened to a prison. A prison with no walls, wardens or security guards. Yet escape proves to be just as elusive. The Present Method offers individuals who experience depressive symptoms a path toward a happier, more productive life.
Get Out of Your Head and Into the Present!
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